Labels and sexuality
- Emerson Pipes
- Jan 23, 2021
- 3 min read
People sometimes forget that our language is ever-evolving, we learn and develop new words or even use older words to define newer concepts.
The 1901 Dorland’s Medical Dictionary defined heterosexuality as an “abnormal or perverted appetite toward the opposite sex.” More than two decades later, in 1923, Merriam Webster’s dictionary similarly defined it as “morbid sexual passion for one of the opposite sex.” It wasn’t until 1934 that heterosexuality was graced with the meaning we’re familiar with today: “manifestation of sexual passion for one of the opposite sex; normal sexuality.”
The connotations of labels have changed over time, as the attitudes and viewpoints have shifted so have the labels. Both for heterosexuality and homosexuality.
Being Gay or homosexual, specifically when the terms were used not placing these terms on historical relationships before the terms, was seen as dirty or perverse. Homosexuals were criminal or immoral and the labels meant this- to be called homosexual was an offensive or horrible thing. The main source of this outrage was the perception that homosexuality was abnormal as it was not for reproductive purposes- only for pleasure. Even between a heterosexual couple, sex for pleasure was seen as abnormal. Then over time, Heterosexuality was deemed the ‘normal’ sexual attraction.
In ancient Greece, it was Earthly love v.s. Heavenly love. Heavenly love refers to feelings for the beauty of boys, a superior object. Men were free to have pleasurable intimacies with both women and boys - However, we must be careful when talking about this. Should we try place labels we use today on them? Most would say they were likely bi or pan but without the language or understanding of their perception, it would be wrong. Instead, understand that what we see as Bi or Pan or Queer evolved from them.
Many historical couples who, for years have been perceived or overwritten, had ‘close friendships’ or ‘romantic friendships’ today can be seen as being in queer relationships. The language used was different, they, of course, it not have the labels we have today but that doesn’t mean we are right to label them- out societies and culture have evolved with the labels, therefore, we cannot fit people who cannot describe their thoughts or perception of their sexuality with a label.
With the evolving labels and understanding, we began to fill in the spaces left, trying to help people define the small nuances and differences. This of course is a difficult and nearly impossible thing to do as everyone experience attractions/sexual attraction/gender differences and to different degrees. As humans we want to understand everything, however, sexuality is such a large and complex subject it had to define and therefore we continue to evolve our language to accommodate the changes.
My final thoughts:
I believe, after research and with my own perception, that having more labels or definitions does not mean the community is becoming messy/less respected or anything else. Labels have been and always will be a way to help define a part of ourself that we struggle to define by ‘normal’ standards.
If the labels overlap, have similar connotations or little meaning take time not to look at the similarities but what makes it different and why people want to use that label. This should be a way to open up the conversation about sexuality not shut it down- I live by the motto that if it doesn’t hurt anyone then it isn’t my concern
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